Wednesday, April 04, 2007
just tired. Just scared. U know how it feels? No, u don't. u just don’t get it. It's just me alright? It hurts, but so? been eating laksa, curry, tomyam.. etc recently.. i dont know why.
perhaps... just wanna forced out the tears..that ive been holding back.. im like.. emotionless now.. want to cry badly, want to scream my lungs out.. but i cant.. Numb to my surroundings. Scandalous, flirtatious, insensitive. I cant be bothered anymore. Im just me.
Like it, good for you.
Don’t like it, go away.
its like a first attempt at something youre not even sure of. its like stepping into a whole new zone. some call it crossing boundaries. some call it a new experience. whereas others love to term it as just an excuse from escaping from reality. now its your turn to tell me how scary it feels to be me. and here i am killing all my brain cells
there's over a million and one things going on at this point of time. but certain memories are still etched close to your heart and mind - as much as you dont want them to. there are some things that id like to figure out, and there are some things i cant do without. like you and you alone, and the people that were never friends. with all the things you could be, you never could learn how to be. and when im finally done with thinking, then im finally done with you.
i really didnt come this far for you to make it this hard for me
i'm feel like i'm getting shorter. guide me and show me the way. what am i supposed to do? why does it drive me nuts. i never thought i'd be this way, yet that's what's happening to me. why do i feel like i'm screwing things up each time? why do i have so many doubts? why is it that my emotions veer from one end to the other each time? set me free. i miss the times when everything was simple and happy. why does it matter so much to me? why does every little thing affect me... and i thought i'd be able to avoid this. and i thought i was the one who didn't really expect anything. but now. when did i start caring so much? when did it start affecting me so badly?
Mentally drained
Emotionally tired
Physically worn out.
kidnap me. please